A reaper's suicide
by Shi no tamashii
Summary: You become a shinigami by commiting suicide as punishment. That was a well known fact. But how did they commit suicide? My take on how our infamous reapers, The Undertaker, William T. Spears, Grell Sutcliff, and Ronald Knox commited suicide. (Sorry, I don't like Eric and Alan all that much) Warnings for character death and suicide! Sensitive to that? DON'T READ!
1. The Undertaker

**A/N: I'm going from what I suppose is the oldest reaper to the youngest. (Though I like the thought of Undertaker being the very first and perhaps even original Death but I'll leave that idea behind in this 'story?' XD)**

He'd always been fascinated with death. As a kid he grew up near a cemetary where he liked to take stroll and look at the names craved on the crosses. The wooden crosses were made hastely and rarely held more than a few years. He often tried to repare them when he found them broken. The graves weren't all that neat either.

When he was old enough he became a servant in a wealthy family. Long generations of his family had served them and he was destined from birth to follow them. He was a quite attractive young man, his white hair was neatly bound in a long ponytail. The children of the Crevan family always liked to hang around him. They liked how he could creep them out. They were great people. That was, until it all went up in flames. His family. Gone. The Crevan family. Gone. Everything was gone. Where was he when the building went up in flames? He was taking a walk in the cemetary. It was his evening off. He should have died right there with them. Instead all he had now was a burned down building and...a knife? The metal glistened in the soft moonlight. The edge of the blade was sharp and clean. It didn't look like it had gone through a fire. Slowly he lifted the small blade up and stared at it with haunted eyes. He had heard the screams from afar. He came running when he saw the smoke. He smelled the fire before it was visible. Yet he hadn't thought twice. He tore the black silken fabric that bound his hair together loose and threw it away. He didn't want this anymore. He wanted nothing but relief. The knife was held in a steady grip. High in the air, the moonlight reflected from the sharp blade into light grey-ish blue eyes. The knife was the last thing he saw as a mortal man. "Primitus." He whispered when he next opened his eyes. Blurred vision. Golden green eyes. Something was off..

Why did his throat hurt so much?

"Primitus? That is your name?" A deep voice asked from his left. "I am Anderson and happy that I'm not alone anymore." Anderson said in obvious relief.

 **A/N: 'Primitus' means "The first" and "in the beginning" also, I just might write a sequel to this chapter in another fanfic, not sure though XP**

 **Chapter two: William T. Spears**

 _His hope had extinguished like a dying candle in the wind. There. William Spears looking up to the biggest tree in the entire forest._

 _A loop that formed a beautiful circle of death._


	2. William T Spears

Chapter two: William T. Spears

There was a legend in his town, that when you entered the hanging forest, you'd die. Many people stayed away, they were afraid of the ghosts lurking in the darkness, waiting for a mortal soul of a living man to cross over into the woods and hang them.

One fine evening however, a young man with messy black hair, and deep chocolat brown eyes got it into his head to enter the dark forest. He knew the legend. He simply didn't care. His wife had died, his only child yet to be born had died with her. He'd prayed. He wanted them to live, have a happy life. He wanted to give his life, if only they would be spared.

His prayers went unheard and no one answered his call for help once her dying breath faltered. He was alone now. He had no one to live for anymore. His hope had extinguished like a dying candle in the wind. There. William Spears looked up to the biggest tree in the entire forest. It probably was the heart of the forest. Silently he stepped forward. There was a cord with a perfect knot at the end. A loop that formed a beautiful circle of death. A single tear fell from his dark eyes as he took a deep breath. He climbed the tree and closed his eyes once he felt the cord in his hands. He didn't even care to think where the cord had come from, or why. When he opened his eyes for the last time he saw a black clad person coming his way. Long silvery white hair danced in the wind. William had only time to register golden green eyes looking up at him as the world blurred around him.

 **Chapter three: Grell Sutcliff**

 _Her red hair was brought up in a bun. He'd commented on that, said it was just as beautiful as herself._

 _If only she was a man and could be as heartless as them. Little did she know her wish would soon become painful reality._


	3. Grell Sutcliff

A young woman crossed the streets of london. It was the perfect day for a walk in the park. She lived nearby and absolutely loved the neighborhood. The people were always nice to her. Her light amber eyes always lit up when she saw one specific man though. She loved the attention men gave her, but when _he_ gave it to her, her chest grew too small and her heart felt like exploding. Today he had visited her in her apartment. He had brought her red roses. She loved roses. Her red hair was brought up in a bun. He'd commented on that, said it was just as beautiful as herself. He even declared how much he loved her.

Once in the park she saw what she wished she'd never seen. There he was. Her beloved. A pretty young blonde sat next to him on the bench they first met. They looked like a perfect young couple.

"Grelle." He had said when he saw her standing there. Grelle ran as fast as she could with heels and her suddenly too tight dress. Tears streamed down her face in sorrow. He had betrayed her. He had told her he loved her. If only she was a man and could be as heartless as them. Little did she know her wish would soon become painful reality. Pills worked slow but effective. She slowly slipped into a deep sleep. But not before seeing someone enter her bedroom and kneel down beside her. Long white hair was all she could see before everything faded away. Her amber eyes lightening to an unearthly color as they slipped shut. Her ears deaf to the amused chuckle that left the figure's lips.

 **Chapter four: Ronald Knox**

 _He even dyed his hair half black. Knowing how much his father hated dyed hair or big changes in general._

 _"Ronald Knox!" He was angry. He was always angry. Things went bad when he got angry._


	4. Ronald Knox

He had an unusual sense of style. He wore his suits as if he'd been mugged. He was the son of a noble and he _hated_ it. He'd ran away multiple times but never could he escape his father's powers over him. He even dyed his hair half black. Knowing how much his father hated dyed hair or big changes in general. So he did everything the man hated and honestly? He liked his style. It was different from the others. He only needed white shoes to perfect it. But he never found the perfect pair. Perhaps a hat too? He was still thinking about that one. He loved to make out with the young ladies in town. They were nice and always blushed around him. Was it a gift? Was it natural? When he was little he had heard a story of the lady in red who got betrayed by her lover and commited suicide. The young blonde swore to never hurt a girl this bad. The story of the red lady soon died down though. She was only the ghost of a memory. Everyone knew the story was true though. Elder men claimed to have seen her, how they greeted her every day in their younger years and that one day, someone found her. She was long gone by then. Some even say they heard a man laughing in her apartment so everthing had been checked for possible homicide, but it was proven suicide.

He hated the thought of killing someone like that. He did like a one night stand but he would never say 'I love you' if he didn't mean it.

With a sad sigh he found his way back to the mansion. His father hated him, yet he wasn't allowed to leave. To have a life of his own. No. He'd be forced to marry some day and take over his father's factory. He entered the building in silence. Until..

"Ronald Knox!" He was angry. He was always angry. Things went bad when he got angry.

"I beg your pardon, father. I forgot the time." He said in a monotone. He hated how formal and polite he had to be from his father. He liked to talk loud and just _be_ loud!

"You are an ignorant brat. Why can't you be like everyone else here?!" His father shouted angrily. Ronald wanted to sound annoyed when he _was_ annoyed, but his father would get even madder when he changed his voice pitch.

"Because you're a terrible father?" The warmth left the room as soon as his words drifted around in the still air. Everything around them seemed to darken until his father almost _jumped_ at him. He saw servants covering their mouth when he ran past them to his father's study. He was tired of running. His mother had ran and never come back. She'd left him, thinking he'd become just like _him_. His father. He entered his father's study, the older man fuming after him. In one swift motion he opened the drawer and took out a small revolver. He pointed it to his father, his gaze void of emotion. Piercing dark blue eyes met equally dark blue.

"You are a pest to this world." His father spat in disgust. Not caring if he stood in direct line of the gun. "You wouldn't even dare to shoot your old man." He said with a laugh. He walked closer to the desk Ronald stood behind and opened his mouth to say something else. A shot rang through the air as the trigger was pulled steadily. With a thud he fell to the ground. He was still breathing and conscious when a second shot sounded. Another thud and another breath that could be very well the last. A red clad person walzed into the room.

"Ah, poor dears." The figure said with a sigh. "Devin Knox and Ronald Knox die the third of august. Devin was shot by his son. Ronald commited suicide by shooting himself with the same gun." The red figure seemed to read from a book. "Devin dies at...let's see, now." A loud buzzing noise and a panicked whimper followed by a sickening sound was all that Ronald could hear. The red man? seemed so fiminen to Ronald that he could have mistaken him for a woman. Could he...she be the lady in red? No, impossible. Why would she be carrying a weapon? "Why, Ronald, right? You die in three minutes. Bled to death." The man said.

"Who...who are you?" Ronald struggled to ask. A sharp toothed grin spread on the red head's face.

"I am your new mentor. There is a punishment for commiting suicide. You'll become a grim reaper. Just like me." A mad laugh that made Ronald shiver filled the room. Three minutes seemed like an eternity as he waited for the reaper's next action. At first his body had grown unbearably hot, sweating as if he'd ran miles and miles on end. The room was spinning and he felt like fainting, but he stayed awake. He felt his blood flowing out if him and soaking his vest. He felt cold and warm both at the same time, it was agonizingly slow. "My name is Grell by the way." The red clad man said before taking his weapon in hand. 'Grell.' Ronald thought. The name of the lady in red. 'Grelle.' He smiled when the weapon burried inside him, his world fading from red to black.

 **A/N: That was fun to write O.O**

 **Also, the bloodloss scene was written from my own experience...less fun ;) _(yes I'm still alive and well ;P)_**

THE END


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